I have very little experience with dating, used various hang-ups to justify not dating up until the pandemic, but when being alone became a decision forced upon me rather than something I decided on, it made me rethink things and I ended up signing up for a bunch of dating apps at the start of last year despite still having some hang-ups. Have gone on a handful of dates, nothing that's transitioned into an actual relationship because either I or the girl decided we weren't a good match.

I wanted to know if you guys exclusively date larger girls, or if you're open to dating average/skinny girls in the hopes you could broach the subject of your kinks later on and get them to gain weight? The whole idea sounds horrid to me to be honest, and I feel like I would just end up ruining things, but I do not think I'm capable of getting it up for a girl who isn't at least chubby. Still a virgin, so I don't know for sure that pure affection couldn't do it for me, I just get that sense.

I live in California, and there don't seem to be a ton of larger women on these apps, and a lot of the ones who are I just don't have much in common with. I'm decent enough looking but 100% a fucking dork with limited interests. A lot of the profiles of girls that do share a lot in common with me tend to be on the super skinny side, and I just feel like things would fall apart once things got to the bedroom. I do want to make genuine connection with someone, but I'm way too horny to not value that physical intimate side of a relationship. Was hoping some other anons could share their experiences/stories.

Every single one of my 4 vanilla, straight-sized gfs willingly gained for me.

Girls are chill af about this stuff if you're not psychotic about it

>>50931 (OP)
I've attempted to hook up with a number of girls below my threshold for genuine attraction and its a miserable experience for both parties. There is no perfect solution to this cursed fetish so you just have to compromise between attraction and shared interests.

Find a girl who is "curvy" or at least has a predisposition for becoming fat. You want to date somebody who can make you cum, of course.

Girls who are already fat are fine, but I find they have self esteem problems and are constantly worried about being courted by fat fetishists.

Tbh I have only had experience dating smaller girls. My long term gf was 160 pounds when I started dating her. She was curvy but not really fat. It was enough that I liked her body and could enjoy sex.

After dating for almost 10 years I stopped giving a shit and started "confessing" during sex that I liked her belly, grabbing her ass, belly and hips etc. Eventually she started playing along, and realised how much more turned I was (sex was OK before but was now amazing). She was kind of amazed that I hadn't told her earlier, and I just explained that it was embarrassing to deal with. I explained to her that it's basically the 2nd, if not the 1st most popular fetish.

She's gained 50 pounds now, with a bit of intention but without much pressure from me.

>>50947

Where the hell do you live?

Every girl with extra pounds I've dated has been extremely insecure and every time I've brought up anything related to feedism it backfired.

Are you fat yourself? I'm fit and I find that it makes women feel more insecure even if I express that I like women with extra pounds

>>51009

It's funny (sad) how the women who will complain about society judging them so harshly will claim that any guy who's into their body is a fucked up fat fetishist too.

'I can't believe that society makes you feel ugly for not being a swimwear model these days...wait you find my body hot? what the fuck is wrong with you?'

>>51020
Dude. It’s clear you’re ugly and unlikable.
Normal women want to be hot for their boyfriend.
It sounds like you’re already shooting out of your league buddy, asking women who don’t like/respect you to trash her body for some losers approval is wacko shit bruh.

>>51030
Normal women aren't willing to 'trash' their body for a man no matter how much they think the sun shines out of his dick.

A woman might be willing to go along with the fantasy side or maybe gain a couple of pounds but no self respecting woman would gain significant weight just to appease a partners fetish, and no respectful partner would expect that of them if they didn't share their fetish.

If anything I shoot below my league. I'm 6'5 muscular and stereotypically handsome with more wit and charisma than most guys on this site, but that doesn't mean women are willing to ruin their physiques for me. And I haven't asked them to.

When I visited America I noticed a lot more fat women who seemingly felt more relaxed being that size especially in the southern states it wasn't uncommon to see young women with their belly hanging out and stuff I have never seen in Australia. So I think that has a lot to do with it.

>>51032
> Normal women aren't willing to 'trash' their body for a man no matter how much they think the sun shines out of his dick.
Me and the other anon told you they do. All of my exes put on weight (50-150lb depending on the person/time).

> no self respecting woman would gain significant weight just to appease a partners fetish
You’re such a loser. Women will starve themselves for a winner or binge/puke regularly.

> I'm 6'5 muscular and stereotypically handsome with more wit and charisma than most guys on this site
Ok. I’m not sure what’s attractive in Australia but in America we’d accuse you of having fetal alcohol syndrome or the deleterious phenotypes of excessive inbreeding…but insults aside buddy. You’re a neurotic loser with no confidence no amount of extra testosterone can make women respect a whiny loser bitch.

> When I visited America
People who can’t afford healthcare shouldn’t visit America. Get a job and pay for your pussy the way loser like you are supposed to.

Have you never had a woman actually care about you? If you were half as attractive as you think you are you wouldn’t be striking out with fat chicks and complaining online like an incel. (Which you do this every 3 months, get a therapist you ugly loser)

>>51034

You're either a liar of a scumbag, or both.
As I said no remotely healthy minded woman would destroy her body just to keep a guys dick hard.

And one of the reasons I struggle with women is because unlike you evidently I actually have standards and I'm not about to coerce a woman into fucking up her health for my own gratification.

And if you really have been tracking me for so long you would know that I don't struggle to get thin/fit women, just fat women which is why I'm so frustrated.

>>50947
Same. My last two exes both gained for me, the first one would do banana and sprite bloats and send me pics of her unbuttoned pants when she ate too much at work. The 2nd got big enough to grab handfuls of her belly but started to hate it but that was because her job required her to be fit.
Girl I am seeing now already wanted to gain due to be underweight before we met.

>>51083
>As I said no remotely healthy minded woman would destroy her body just to keep a guys dick hard.
Have you ever met a woman?

>And one of the reasons I struggle with women is because unlike you evidently I actually have standards and I'm not about to coerce a woman into fucking up her health for my own gratification.
So you are a sperg then. Just say that next time.

>>51083
> And one of the reasons I struggle with women is because unlike you evidently I actually have standards and I'm not about to coerce a woman into fucking up her health for my own gratification.
Ok boomer.

>>51091
> So you are a sperg then. Just say that next time.
He also didn’t deny having fetal alcohol syndrome. He might be retarded as well. The rare double disability.

In my late-40s now. I dated smaller girls when I was younger, though mostly curvy, a few sizes bigger than they probably could be due to my love of large breasts. That probably did me a favour with most of my mates. '2 reasons why he loves her isn't there' type comments.

Just because I started dating only 350lb+ women in my mid-20s didn't mean I wasn't attracted to anything smaller, it was just the size and fatness fulfilled me much more.

I obviously come from a time when we didn't use apps and matching up mattered and I think you should dis-regard the algorithm and still chase any larger girl you are physically attracted to. Most people like going out for a drink and something to eat and watching films. You'll find common music likes too even when your general taste doesn't match. It's life.

If you like fat, you like fat, there are more than enough chubby women these days. Hell, 25 years ago when I first jumped in to make conversation with a 400lb girl clearly getting comments from some young fucking asshats there were enough 300lb girls about that I chased and hooked up with after that.

One thing you hadn't brought up though which needs mentioning, try and lay off the deeper side of fat fetishism when knocking one out. Don't let it become your sole fixation, it's a fantasy card they're playing that they want to be 700lb and eating pizza in bed as part of sex etc. Too much of it will rot your real life experiences up to fuck.

You will likely find more than your share of fat girls who are at least contended with being fat because you think they are fucking beautiful. It's life. Get out and date women, it's what you do to learn the lessons that get you to the one that rocks your world.

>>51020

These gfs were across san diego, SF, and portland, and nah, I'm not fat

Maybe I'm just extremely lucky, I don't think you should think this is a reflection of yourself, because yeah, it's one the biggest insecurities that exists in society.

To elaborate:

First offered to gain in the first few months, and was chill with the fetish but she had huge body issues, gained maybe 50 lbs over the 6 years unintentionally, but she worked out constantly to try not to be fat. Eventually discovered keto, lost it all and left me for someone way cooler.

Second had an ex that constantly pressured her to lose weight, then I gave her a free pass and she let herself gain from 160-263 in our 4 years. She got really into fat fetishism halfway through and always squished herself and thought about how fat she was when she fapped.

Third has an ex anorexic that originally had a thinspo blog. She initially wasn't into the kink but warmed up to it HARD. Would nonchalantly talk about hitting 200 (from 160) and seeing how she feels about 220 from there. Would say during sex, "WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME? WHY IS THIS SO HOT?" and our sex talk revolved around that shit. She even said completely outside of sex or any horny situation, "...I wish you'd be more assertive in fattening me up." would say shit like, "i can't wait to be literal soft serve in your bed. Broke up because she was kinda fucked in the head. Hilarious and sweet person, but could go into these hysterical cry/anger fits for hours if something set her off.

Current girlfriend is also ex anorexic, like, some really rough shit. She does struggle with insecurity sometimes, but she has fun with it, explores it as a way to heal, gets turned on by it during sex, and jokes about it as she's my "DIY chubby girl burgis-pilled, squishmaxxer" she's gone from 110-145 in the past 2 years and when i told her my ex was around 160, she laughed and said, "rookie numbers"

All that being said, none of them were ever scared off by the kink, and all of them were willing to engage in at least some extent. As long as they love you, and know you love them a lot of girls are pretty open-minded

>>51163

That's cool you got to experience all that, I guess the common threads is that they've all had an unheatlhy relationship with eating/weight loss in their earlier life which set them up to be a bit more open minded with exploring this kink.

Were you looking out for any signs or did you just happen to get lucky with all of them?

And did you wait a few months to bring it up? I can't imagine they would have enough trust to feel safe being that vulnerable in the early days of dating. Or maybe I've just gotten really unlucky with the wrong types of women.

>>50931 (OP)
I have almost exclusively dated big women. I never had the confidence to try and get a skinny girl to gain for me. I only told my (now) wife, who is not into it but she is fucking hot and about 350#.

Looking back I wish I had opened up to myself earlier and tried. I fucked a lot of fat chicks but I really wish I got to make one myself.

>>51226

>Were you looking out for any signs or did you just happen to get lucky with all of them?

Nah, just if they were cute and seemed compatible personality/interest-wise

>And did you wait a few months to bring it up?

First one I didn't really explicitly announce, I think I mentioned I like chubby girls and over the months it came out that I had a weight gain fetish. Zero judgment from her part

Second, after about 2 months while massaging her feet after sex

Third, was second date at my apt, we were talking about kinks and I wouldn't tell mine and was being kinda sneaky/meme about it. She got offended that I couldn't trust her, so I told her and she was relieved, "Oh, that's it? I thought it was gonna be like turning me into a lampshade or some shit"

Current, probably 1 month in

With 3-4, I always led with something along the lines of, "By the way, something you should know about me, and I'll never bring it up again if it makes you uncomfortable, and I'll love you no matter what, but I have a kink that has an abysmal reputation and how you feel about yourself is 10,000x more important than my stupid boner, but, I find it really hot when a girl gains like 5 lbs for me. Kinda like an exhibition thing, knowing everyone can see what they've done for me and to turn me on, but none the wiser.

Just be as tactful and genuine as you can, don't memorize it as a script or anything

>>51260

Thanks for actually delving into detail about how you go about telling them.

My approach was more to tell them that I just find chubby women / belly fat sexy without the element of gratification from having someone gain for me, but maybe in hindsight that's a better way to go about it, and I think mentioning bellies specifically can trigger some intense self consciousness.

I was just worried about making them feel like a fetish object even if you talk about it with tact , since the one time feedism came up in a group discussion people basically treated it like it was worse than necrophilia saying how gross and greedy it was, and I thought maybe if women just think I'm into chubby girls rather than gaining that would go down better.

I think it's just a shock more than anything to a lot of women because it's so far removed from the narrative they keep being fed. Even though it's objectively a pretty mild one (besides from the death feedism shit) it just throws a lot of women for a loop.

And sometimes I'm just too nervous to bring it up because I don't want to risk ruining a potential relationship if they really dont react well.

I'll take some notes from your approach.

Facebook dating y’all. Idk if it’s just the obvious pot for the “less than beauty standard” or has a good algorithm (let’s be honest, zucc knows my search history 😏) but that’s where I see all the good bodies

>>51307
I just got Facebook for keeping up with family, how DO you date on it?

>>51337 shit idk it’s just available on mobile under the menu. Like if it’s not GLARING obvious on your mobile app my dumb ass can’t help you lmao

>>51307

It's funny whenever I seen it come up in discussion people say dont bother it's full of fat women as if that's a bad thing.

It says it's unavailable for me though. I tried to make an alt account on another device and it said the same thing so I guess it's not an option

>>51338
Well hopefully my family won't be able to see what I do on there lol

>>51352
Same thing happened to me. It's just not there for me at all, not really sure what I'm supposed to do lol

If you're that into it that you need to ask advice about talking about being into feedism on a Chan-site...because you literally think you can't even perform for skinny chicks...you literally just need to use a site like Feabie where you can air that shit out in the open right away.

Clearly you either at least want a feedee or a fat chick...look for them on the website that caters to them.

>>51401 problem is feabie is a lot of the same same especially locally. I’ve hardly ever seen newbies pop up close to me and I’m not driving multiple states for someone

>>51401
OP here, I signed up for a Feabie account but it doesn't seem catered for dating, more like a shitty message board or something.

>>51307
Facebook dating for me is full of huge hot women, but they all explicitly are looking for real, long term relationships.

Feabie is obviously packed with people actually into the fetish, but it’s so parasocial it’s best to stay away. I recommend keeping off the regular feed and just sticking to dming with people you’re interested in

>>51401
Feabie sucks
t. frequent feabie flyer

>>51417
I swear to God, feabie is a list of insufferable women to avoid due to their various mental health problems