/elite/

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Have you ever found a piece of writing that you liked, kept coming back to, or otherwise found interesting... except for that one little thing? A tiny detail that rubbed you the wrong way enough that you decided to take matters into your own hands and edit the author's original version?

I don't know if this is something people do or just my own eccentricity, but I find myself doing it to greater lengths these days and wanted to see if anyone else did the same.

If so, how do you feel about it? Do you ever have thoughts of publishing it, or is it just for your private enjoyment. And what particular details warrant editing a story for you?
To start this thread off, I'm a big fan of crudeatom's works. Particularly his "A Test of Generations" and its sequel. He's one of the few authors who writes sex involved immobile characters.

Except... he has a habit of making douchey protagonists. Almost all of them with rather antiquated views about women. In his stories the main man is usually buff, rich, and oozing with confidence. And he inevitably fattens women up and takes complete control of their lives. This sort of thing is kind of expected when ladies become too big to move, but it often gets into situations which seem uncomfortably close to abusive relationships. The female leads also lose all agency and characterization when the fattening begins, leaving them as two-dimensional trash compactors to dump food into and watch grow.

Also his dialogue can be cheesier than Wisconsin.

So I take it upon myself to do edits of works of his I like. Sometimes they're a few line changes, sometimes more. The most recent one, of Humanity's Test and its sequel, has added entirely new story beats to improve the overall flow. Anything to make it enjoyable as both fetish material and a story in its own right.
Occasionally I'll find a male wg story I like, however I'm not into male gains so I edit it to make the characters women.
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I find a furry story with the exact niche weight gain kinks I love and edit out all references to fur, snouts, and paws, until it's just two normal humans.
>>2800
Can you share some?
>>2813
Here's a section from the second chapter. Compare with the original source: https://www.deviantart.com/crudeatoms/art/Test-of-Generations-2-860957803

When Pete Jr saw Ginger waddling to the door to the yard, he got up and helped her. It was already open, just not open enough.
“Thanks,” she said as he slid the glass door as far as he could.
“You’re welcome.”
He stood to the side and watched her wheel out a cart, creaking under the load of what could have been called a banquet (by him) or snack (by his mother). The cart wasn’t the only thing that was heavy - even with the door open, Ginger’s hips barely made it through.
Phoebe’s eyes lit up when she saw the food coming. Pete Jr knew it wasn’t that she was hungry. After all, she had a tube in her mouth, pumping her full of rich slop infused with weight gain powder and potent appetite stimulants.
But that was flavored goo.
This was real food.
Another servant, Ronda, came out with another cart. She was newer than Ginger - at only around 300 pounds she stepped through the door with ease.
Both wore uniforms Molly and Phoebe, as heads of the household, had commissioned for their servants - dresses tight enough to show every bulge and curve, but stretchy enough to survive their growth. Strangely, few of the maids hired by their family displayed the urge to grow alongside their mistresses. Yet still, an endless cycle of feeding and cleaning and cooking basically ensured weight gain, at some point. Beneath the notice of their employers the maids of the town had an entire subculture to themselves, including superstitions about magical energies and satanic pacts for endless growth.
Pete Jr loved them, not that he knew anything about all that. Not allowed to have “big boy sex” as his mother annoyingly called it, he fantasized about the revolving cast of maids. Before Samantha, of course. Now every woman paled before her divine beauty.
Ginger dragged her cart onto a small, elevated platform. She turned off Phoebe’s food pump and started feeding her by hand. Pete Jr listened as his mother moaned and gasped in ecstasy. “Mm, yes, feed me!" she said.
“It’s an honor to fatten you up, miss,” Ginger said.
Phoebe smiled at her. Thanks to the best weight gain powder available anywhere, she didn’t have a human shape anymore. Her face emerged from a vast sea of blubber and rolls that swallowed her limbs. Her breasts, belly and ass had all merged into one enormous blob.
She was fat, even by the standards of this town, which made her the fattest person in history.
But it wasn’t enough. She weighed tens of tons and was too big for any house… but if a genie offered to double her weight, she would in a moment.
She was extraordinarily obese… but not fat enough.
Molly felt the same way, she knew. Her best friend turned lover turned sister-wife was probably only a thousand pounds lighter than her… and closing the gap. The beautiful blonde was too competitive to settle for second biggest.
If Phoebe was at all insecure, she might be worried. Molly had a great appetite and her pale skin had developed a tan from being in (that is, taking up half of) the backyard. Plus she and Peter had a history.
She could turn their husband’s head as easily as breathing.
But she wasn’t worried. Partly because Peter could feed and fuck every woman in the world, and she knew he’d still have the time to satisfy her. And partly because Phoebe wasn’t the kind of girl to feel shame even before her sudden slip into obesity.
Phoebe missed her husband - he had been gone for months and the video visits with her touchless computer set up didn’t cut it - but she knew when he returned, he was gonna lose all control and sink into her fat body, bringing them both endless pleasure…
Molly simpered at her closest sister-wife. She knew Phoebe well enough to know what she was thinking, even behind those balloon cheeks of hers. It was easier to spot her face, flagged by gorgeous black curls tipped with blonde highlights, flowing into a huge mane that threatened to obscure her entire vision if she didn’t get it cut every month or so. Molly was lucky, hers was straight. Still, letting it get too long was awfully itchy.
Pete Jr smiled as Ginger fed his birth-mother, Phoebe, and Ronda fed his other mother, Molly. One of these days, Samantha would give in and him fatten her up like this…
“Hey,” Riley said, sidling up next to him. Her face was flushed and she gleamed of sweat. She was still the opposite of who her mother was now - lean, toned and athletic, with no desire to eat more than three light meals a day.
She exercised regularly, in a family with women too fat to wiggle their fingers. Or rather, too preoccupied to try. They still had all their muscle, somewhere under there.
“Hey,” Pete Jr said.
“Dad gets back soon, right?” she asked.
“I think so?” he said, even though he was counting down the days. They had been chatting every other day on the phone and he had told his father about Samantha… and how stubborn she was about staying skinny.
Peter said the same thing over and over, “Don’t get hasty Petey/patience is rewarded greatly by fate/ I’m sure it’ll turn out fine if you’re honest with her and take it slow.”
Pete Jr was a bit miffed about this. His day was an uber-cool badass playboy, why was he parroting an after-school special? Still, excitement ran up and down his spine.
“Good,” Riley said, “because I had some ideas to run by him. I know Dad did some marketing back when he was about our age, so he knows what he’s doing, but I did some research. Did you know there are entire platforms we could be advertising on-“
He scoffed. “Advertising? Every woman in town buys as much weight gain powder as she can afford. Who needs it when everyone girl wants to be fat?”
Every woman except my girl friend, he thought bitterly, hating the space between the letters.
Riley frowned. “Everyone except your girlfriend. But you gotta think bigger. What about the accessories? Feeding tubes, stretchy uniforms - I think there’s more money to be made.”
“Wow, if you like this stuff so much why do you hate getting fat?” Pete meant it as a joke, but his sister clearly didn’t take it that way.
She gave him a scowl – no, this wasn’t a scowl. She was a teenager; she scowled all the time. This was a loaded weapon, a glare that didn’t just launch daggers, but entire armories at her half-brother.
Junior walked away, desperate to avoid her gorgon gaze.
After a moment’s consideration, he then doubled back. “I hope he likes your ideas.”
“Thanks.” she said, poison dripping with the syllable. She turned her attention to her notes, a small tear dropping onto her notepad, and he wandered off, once again feeling the sting of shame.
>>2816
I admit his version had some problems, but you somehow made it even worse. And *extremely* cringeworthy,
>>2823
Have any specific complaints? Advice is always appreciated
There's a slob xwg story by weeb-lord that I love... except it's futa, which is honestly a huge turn-off for me. I replaced all the references to cock and slightly edited one scene.

I have a few other stories by other people that I edited just to try to practice dialogue or get a sense of pacing as well.
>>2800
>all of them with rather antiquated views about women. In his stories the main man is usually buff, rich, and oozing with confidence.
That's based though.
>>2799 (OP)
I agree on that point so much. There’s been tons of stories that have brilliant ideas but I just can’t get into because it’s either male fat stuff or near the end the writer adds in tons of slob stuff that ruins the whole mood
>>2799 (OP)
There's a guy called brickhousebunny21 on sofurry who does stories that actually check a few of my good boxes. One problem: pretty much all of them include minors having sex. Ick.
I'd edit them, but either the guy got booted, or the site archive got neutered and you can't view them without an account (if anyone wants to test that, that'd be super).
https://www.sofurry.com/view/94966
https://www.sofurry.com/view/99542
Yeah, I do this all the time. Sometimes it's something as sumple as Ctrl+H a character's name, but other times it can be gender swaps, character removal, or just simply focussing the gaining towards my particular needs.

I keep them private though and wouldn't really feel comfortable resharing them. Some people in this community especially take umbrage when people edit their work and its drama we all can do without.
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>>2978
Dude, it's Shota, you don't have to do much, just change all the pronouns to female.
>>2978
Hey hey I commissioned that.
But yeah it shouldn't be hard just change the pronouns
Based >>3001 with the solid commissions
>>3118
Thank you. Surprised by its quality considering you had a little over an hour to write it.
Honestly considering no one posts in this htread, I may as well request another one. Edit of the same story https://archiveofourown.org/works/32938927 except with male-to-female transformation, even if it may be too much to request.
I'll post an edit of Corpulency's latest work, since I'm not a fag and want to find it after November:
>>3214
"Error, this is a private paste or is pending moderation. If this paste belongs to you, please login to Pastebin to view it. "
Used to do this shit all the time, would replace the girl's name with whoever I was crushing on at the time in high school. Shit was cash
this makes me sound like an autist but poor grammar is honestly a huge boner killer for me-- if i like a piece but the grammar sucks ill edit it and maybe add some details according to personal taste
>>4642
Yep exactly!

Also childish expectations on pace of weight gain. I’d mentally have to imagine they wrote “months” instead of “weeks” or “year later” instead of “month later” to accommodate for a bump in weight.
>>4660

i dont mind unrealism so much but im glad someone else is bugged by bad writing
>>4660
I too hate lack of realism. Not only do I edit the pace as you mentioned, but occasionally change stories that go beyond realistic expectations of weight so that there is a soother curve, capping at a more realistic number, so that instead of the weight going 250 > 400 > 750 > 1100 > 2000 > 4000, it instead goes 250 > 350 > 500 > 650 > 850 > 1100
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I've been doing this exact thing with this story: https://www.deviantart.com/gendermorph/art/Charlotte-and-the-Chocolate-Factory-Chapter-1-703731674

There was stuff I liked, but the fact the main characters in a fetish fic were children creeped me out. I decided to rewrite it to age up all the characters, change aspects of the story, focus things on weight gain/fat, remove stuff I though didn't add to the story, ect.

I've posted a few samples in the Wonka-themed stories thread. Here's the most up to date version.
More and more i'm finding myself wanting to take good weight gain stories that feature male characters and edit completely to be female, but I haven't reached that level of autism yet. Also editing out fart stuff from slob stories
In the story "roll change" after the female protagonist hannah who was the main male's love interest that was over 500lbs and lost half of her weight and then wanted to fatten up the man years later when he confessed his love for her and he had grown much fatter i always wanted the girl to stay the same size just to give the guy what he desired most the whole time. I felt the woman become to dominant and controlling after she got thinner, i wished someone could rewrite it to where the man confesses his love for hannah earlier in the story and leaves his marriage for her where he decides to fatten up himself on his own terms to rival the size of hannah whether than hannah becoming dominant over him after her weight loss later in the story. I felt the guy should have stayed the dominant one by choosing to gain himself and to dominate the 500lb hannah in the bedroom because he would massively fatter than her. And i also wasn't a fan of introducing another love interest who was a bbw later in the story because I thought the romance between hannah and the main guy was enough, another love interest didn't need to be introduced because it just made things complicated and made the secret love between hannah and the main guy all those years not feel like actual love anymore. I would have rather they just kept the romance between hannah and the main guy where he inspires to become 630 lbs so he outweighs hannah in the bedroom and can dominate her and to gain muscule mass to sweep her off her feet so he hits the gym but also stuffs his face with fast food after working out. The story would have been much better if the main guy grew bigger than hannah (who keeps her same size throughout" and becomes big and strong enough to take the leas in the bedroom.
In the story "The rise of nancy henderson" even though when i read the story wasn't finished yet (I assume) I really wanted the girl's mother to experience some kind of karma for shaming and abandoning her daughter just because she become massively overweight and I felt the daughter should have cursed her mother out and not taken the ridicule. I felt the mother was to cold and cruel in the story and deserved some kind of punishment even if it meant just being told off or humiliated. I think the story moving forward should have focused on the mother where she feels guilty for the way she's treated her daughter and slowly stops being a fitness freak and gaining so much weight she's almost as big as her daughter. The abusive parents in these stories shouldn't get away with what they've said and done they need to be humiliated or punished in some kind of way or if not that get them to change their ways but have to suffer the consequences for it. I really dispised and hated the mother in the story and thought she should have suffered some kind of karma (Maybe she breaks something and has to off her feet for weeks and gains weight because of that?). I haven't been able to find out if the story has been updated in any way but the whole plot with the mother should be reworked where she suffers the consequences for her actions or feels guilty and ends up paying the price for it. It would have even more satisying if nancy punched her mother after being disowned or spit in her face or screamed at her or something instead of just accepting the ridicule and walking away, she should have been angry and furious at her for being shamed all her life to stay skinny and not embrace the fat girl that was trying to be free for so long. The story should be edited where she does one of those things at the airport to her mother before leaving to go back to college and then it shows the mothers point of view where she starts to act hypocritical about the whole situation blaming her daughter but slowly starts to realise how cruel and vile she's been and slowly stops being a fitness freak and gains a massive amount of weight until shes over 400lbs and has to be moved into a care facility because her husband dumps and leaves her for a office secretary. And then nancy gets news about her mothers condition and goes back home to find her mother over 700lbs and fighting for her life where she tearfully says to nancy "forgive me for what I've done i am in no shape to judge anyone fat ever again" but nancy doesn't forgive her and leaves the room in anger as her mother lets out screams of anguish and anger trying to criticize her again before bursting out into tears. It would have been a really good change of plot added to the story and not something you see in these weight gain stories where the hateful parents have to pay the price for the way they've treated their child. The other "mean girls" in the story that were former friends of nancys who mocked and ridiculed her for being obese should suffer similar kind of consequences where over a period of time all of them start gaining weight after slowly succumbing to the college lifestyle and add a scene where a very fat nancy shames them when she sees them all stuffing their faces in mcdonalds and calls them out on theit hypocrisy but they still retort to insults and remarks even though they're all nearly the same size as her now.
In the story "From arrogant pig to just pig" where a teacher and 2 girls fatten up a jock named eric to being obese the tables should turn back on the girls and teachers halfway through the story. Both girls started as fat but lost it but then later in the story they succumb to their consequences and end up gaining all their weight back after what they did to Eric and the same happens to the teacher who baloons to over 400lbs and eric manages to get back in shape but still has loose skin as punishment for his actions. The story felt to cruel and mean spirited, even though eric was a jerk jock all the humiliation and torture he was put through by the 2 girls and teacher didn't need to happen, halfway through the story the reverse should have happened to them and eric slims down but keeps his loose skin as a reminder of his former fat self to reflect on as punishment. And at the end the teacher is now a 500lb woman who has to ride a scooter and she gets spotted by eric in the drive thru holding up the car line as eric flips her the bird before driving off as she grumbles and screams at the employees to hurry up as the line of cars start honking angrily. The 2 girls would both be 350lbs combined and be insulted and ridiculed at the gym after they attempt to work out and fail horribly and they're mocked, realizing that two wrongs don't make a right so they seek out eric begging for his forgiveness but he just laughs and slams the door in the face and they get escorted off his property by the landlord.
In the story "Kim" where the thin and popular girl is exposed as fat and lazy after prom after gaining a ton of weight I would have the end be melanie now is at her her house (over 3 years later) lazing on the couch with pizza boxes and wrappers everywhere she now sports a huge gut I would have her get a knock at the door where she gulps nervously and sees Kim (who would have lost weight but now have saggy skin and a bloated gut) with her former posse as she smirks and says "So it looks like im not the only one who's gotten fat" and they back melanie into a corner as she gulps nervously and lets out a massive fart as she tries to get away but is pinned down by kim and her posse where kim force feeds her to make her huge and massive as revenge.
Can someone change the ending of "Emma" to where she lives and undergoes liposuction to become skinny again but is left with sagging skin as a reminder of her days of being obese? Not really a fan of the characters dying in these stories
I'll sometimes edit first or third person stories to second person, and if it's already in second person but with the wrong pronouns I'll edit them to match mine.
P.S: post your edited stories here, please.
>>4642
Same. When the grammar is wrong, I can't get past it. That steals the focus away from the story itself.

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